When I was first pregnant with Clare I was a little bitter. I was frustrated with myself for getting pregnant when I had. I was embarrassed that I was that bad at birth control. (Come on! Am I a sixteen year old already?!) And I was troubled by the inevitable change that would overwhelm my life within just a few months.
I remember very vividly going out to a nearby hillside while I was still sick and being struck. No seriously. It was like being hit upside the head by a cold feather pillow where all the plumes had fallen to end that was currently colliding with your scull. Ouch!
Instantly, there on that hill, I had been given a vision for her life. This pregnancy was no longer about the inconvenience to my life but was about the light of her own life.
I could see her so clearly, as a bird, beautiful and bright. She was vulnerable yes but adventurous nonetheless, swooping and gliding all over the sky.
I knew then that I had to let go (something I’ve often written about) and trust that she would be ok. After all, I’m not going to cage that singing bird.
Well, people…Clare is almost 7 months old and on the verge of crawling. The minute she wakes up she wants to be going, going, GOING! She will navigate around the room by hopping from person to person.
I was hoping that the cuddling stage would last a little longer but it looks like the time has come to sit back and watch this beautiful bird show me what she was made to do…what she was made to be…
So go little bird. Fly! But please wait until I get the electrical sockets plugged.