Babies R … scary

bruSo last night over a casual dinner of left overs I mentioned to Andrew that I was going to go to Babies R Us to just check out what they had. 

No big deal. No drama, which is rare for me.  

I didn’t even insist that Andrew come along.  I simply offered and said if he wanted to come…he could. And by my surprise he said, “Sure!”

So we packed down texas rice and old potatoes soaked in mustard, Put the dog in “his room” and whisked off to the store of all baby stores. We thought it might closing soon so we weren’t going to register…we were just going to look.

Well, when we got to the store, shining with the brightness of a thousand baby bottoms, We saw that we did in fact have a about an hour before the doors were locked and decided, unaware of the severity of the step we were about to take, that it would be a good idea to register now and get it over with.  After all…Why not?

Ahead of us in line were two women about the same age who both looked equally pregnant and a young man with several teeth missing. Of course we didn’t see that until he laughed at Andrew’s joke about registering for a Wii. Evidently the young man had actually registered for said item – to be used for valuable parent/child bonding I’m sure. So the family walked away, the women looking angry and hungry and the man still laughing at Andrew, and we slipped up to the counter to register with sweet smiles on our faces, hoping to register painlessly and leave.

We signed a few things and created some passwords (nothing out of the ordinary), got our gun, and then a package filled with sample baby bottles and 8 (no joke) parenting magazines and best of all the BABIES R US CHECKLIST! Mana from heaven!baby registry copyLittle did we know that there is an ENTIRE section devoted to High Chairs in the check list.  Under “Strollers” they insist that you “must have” a travel stoller, a full-sized stroller, an umbrella stroller (the only kind I had when I was little), a jogging stroller, a convenience stroller (?!), stroller toys (specifically for the stroller), stroller netting (for catching falling babies?) and on and on. That’s 5 different strollers! 5! We’re having 1 baby…

So of course after glancing over the list I ran to the clothes.  They did have the cutest clothes I had ever seen – little dresses and bloomers and shoes.  Andrew and I had about 80 items as we were exiting the baby girl isle.  Andrew insisted that most of the clothes I picked out looked exactly like something I would wear. “So you can match right?”

“Well not matchy, matchy.” I said.

“But that looks like that dress you had last year.”

“NO…no…not exactly…gah!”

Next we moved onto mattresses and baby sheets, then to blankets and baskets and diaper disposal. We both looked at each other at one point and said, “We need a special trash can for diapers?”

The one thing we put on our registry was a glider covered in soft brown corduroy  that simply wrapped you up in comfort.  If I were given the option of sitting in that chair while nursing…I would not stop nursing…all day and all night…gladly. Granted, it was 400 dollars. So….

But then, and this is just the worst, we moved on to “GEAR”. Bouncers, strollers, highchairs, portable cribs and each one of these items had their own twenty foot isle.  What the heck?  We literally stood there and stared for fifteen minutes unable to move or speak. At that point we put some electric socket plugs on our list and left as quickly as possible in order to save our marriage and our sanity. baby bottle

I still am unsure if I will ever be able to go back. Please feel free to share your baby gear story.


8 responses

  1. Oh, I hear you. The “need” list at BRU is ridiculous! Before I had Annalia, I had to keep reminding myself that all I really needed was the carseat to bring her home in, and some clothes to keep her warm. And a safe place to sleep.

    Oh, and that $400 rocker – you are smart. I’ll have to get a bunch of us together to get that for you. Totally worth it.

    Good luck. And if you need ANY girl things, let me know. I have more clothes than I know what to do with.

  2. oh man. my plan is to just ask all my friends with babies what they bought, and then copy them (which in just a few short months means YOU!). so far on my list are a miracle blanket and a baby sling. i’m super excited about slinging my little one to and fro. beyond that…mmm. clueless. 🙂

  3. I Almost did that. almost. I thought hey lets see what Amazon has first that way I can get a feel of it. Amazing there baby check list was so great and it made me feel more in control when I did go the that baby gadget land… to register for clothes.

  4. that book Crystal told you about “Baby Bargains” was a lifesaver for us! It was really helpful for the whole overwhelming process. That and friends who told me what they loved. I will think about some of my favorite baby items and I will let you know. Registering is totally not a quick process. The nice thing is though, that now that you have started the process you can add stuff online. :o)

  5. Please take my diaper pail. It really is wonderful and much better than the diaper genie. I am really done with it now that I don’t change Jack as much. Let me know!

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